The cheddar...

... cheese of course. I recently got myself set up with business cards and went full-bore on the cheese, see the pic below

(NOTE: After I had posted a pic of the card I started thinking about the info on it, not exactly stuff I'd like anyone having access to, so I took it offline, if you'd like to see it just leave a comment below and I'll send it to ya if I know ya.)

Now I too can be important and whip out a business card when I happen to meet other important people with business cards and casually say, "Let's do lunch" or "Have your people call my people" while snubbing those without such basic items as inferior beings. Everyone knows that without a business card, you're not important.