16 April 2006

Happy Easter?

Today was the first day that I've had so far that was really rough emotionally. Nothing particular happened, there was no triggering event really, I just woke up and felt like crap. I sat through my meetings wondering what it was all about, what do I have to look forward to, why am I here, what's the point. To make things worse, one of the briefs I sat through was supposed to help show the progress that we've made over the last 3 months, to encourage us, but I just couldn't grasp it. To make things even worse-er, after that brief, I got beat up about something that happened several days ago that was well out of my control. When it rains... to top it all off, it's a small silly thing, none the less it didn't help any, I had just got a program that I had spent weeks waiting for only to find out that it wouldn't work on my computer. Oh, another thing, we had a unit Easter egg hunt and after we had called it quits I realized that not only had I won, but I had cleaned up. I was the big kid that knocks down the little kids so they don't get the eggs.

I felt lower than whale turd.

Oh, wait, I forgot, it's Easter and I'm away from my family. What's below whale turds?

I wrapped up my routine tasks at about 2130 and decided that I needed to do some thinking and, more importantly, praying. So I went out to my hammock and just swung in the warm evening Baghdad breeze. It had been a really long time since I had done some really good praying. I won't share the conversation here in this forum, but after several hours of swinging in my hammock and talking with God, I felt much better.

I don't mean to worry anyone or try and gain anyone's sympathy, I just think that this was something of a defining moment and wanted to share some of my personal battles as well as my professional ones.


Blogger Rob said...

I always remember one of the sermons that Gary preached in Wainwright about Christians and hard times. I think it's one of the coolest things in the world that bad times can make us better people when we let God pull us through, which it sounds like you did. Happy Easter. Love ya.

Blogger Justin said...

still thinking of and praying for ya man. keep up the good work.

Anonymous BensWahfy said...

Hey Babe,
just thought I would tell you that I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE you!!!!

Hope the Easter Egg belly pic cheers you up a little...
The Wahfy +babyboy

Blogger Justin said...

well, this may seem out of place, but i hope it cheers you up.

i was at a concert tonight, good ole hardrock, hardcore, metal, etc, and one of the bands (Showdown) dedicated one of their songs (can't remember which one) to all servicemen who were or are defending us abroad. So I yelled your name at him. so, you can rest better knowing that you were remembered and valued tonight, as you are every night. Godspeed buddy.


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